Help! I've fallen off the wagon and I can't get up!

Hi...my name is Karen..and I am addicted to junk food and "sitting and eating"....it has been one week since I have done ANY kind of exercise whatsoever....or eaten ANY kind of healthy meal, come to think of it...

I have had a week and a half of parties, water parks, restaurants, and holidays.....

I am amazed at how quickly my "old ways" have become so comfortable again!

Amazed....and disgusted!!

No joke....just yesterday (Mother's Day), I tore up a Malley's hot fudge sundae....for DINNER!!  Yes...dinner.  NOT for dessert AFTER dinner.....FOR dinner!!!

(Just looking at that picture makes my mouth water....)

I need an intervention!!!

Last night, I discovered something while playing with my fat....

(Yes....

I play with my fat....

There are two things I do daily with my stomach....I check it out in the mirror...and I play with my fat....

Much like a pregnant woman rubs her round belly...I rub my round belly too...

and push on it like the Pillsbury Dough Boy...

or squeeze it like it's a monstrous ball of Silly Putty....

Doesn't everybody??.....

I digress....)

So...while playing with my fat I noticed...

a stretch mark....

a soft, indented, stretchy, long, horrifying

stretch mark.

I know...it IS miraculous that I don't have a bunch of them...a gut like this should, logically, be covered in them...but mine is not.  But, just under the left part of my bulging gut (the left-sided bulge IS bigger then the right-sided one), there it is.  

At first I panicked...certainly I was mistaken!  This had to be a scar from one of my abdominal surgeries! ....

but it wasn't.  

It was the first physical indicator... hard-core scientific data... that my skin is being stretched to capacity...

So today...I recommit to my self and my plan.  I have only 34 days until my half marathon!  

I am finding it frustrating to have to recommit every single day!!  But I suppose this is what addiction is, no matter if it is drugs, alcohol...or food.  It is a struggle and a daily commitment to better choices...healthier choices.  

And daily accountability....

It is exhausting and frustrating...but "They" say slow, daily steps are the only way to a larger goal...

The only.....flippin'......way........ (sigh)

Fine.